Random Wanderings, and Fasting
today, being monday, warwick told us to go for a wander and think about something. truthfully, i wasnt really listening to what he told us to do, but i was glad for the time out of the classroom, to enjoy the wonderful day, and to marvel at Gods creation.
so i went for a walk, kinda talked to God, and listened to him talk. when i got back to class after my little stroll, this is what i wrote.
"oh Lord. how hard it is for me to believe truely, that you have forgiven me."
God: "my child, your past, your mistakes, do not make you who you are. you can learn from your mistakes but they do not categorise who you are.
you are loved by me, deeply. know this truth. I FORGIVE YOU!
'rest in me and i'll comfort you.
abide in me and i swear to you
i will NEVER forsake you.'
do not listen to all the lies the world tells you.
my child, i think you are beautiful, let me delight in you. stop trying to look for love from guys. you are not ready yet. i will reveal your Prince to you when i am ready, not when you want me to.
child! stop thinking you are unattractive, it is a lie that not eating will make you more attractive. you are beautiful just how i created you to be.
see child. you have been set free from your sins. dont get bogged down by them. you have a new life to live, and so dont be ashamed.
i love you, i have extended my mercy and grace to you."
warwaick told us to go get into out accountability groups and confess our sins to each other. there had been something that i had wanted to tell them for a while, and i just hadent had the courage to bring it up. and even now, even though i told them, i didnt tell them the deatils. i only said that i had gone further with a guy than what i had wanted to, and further than what i should have. but no details.
warwick then talked about fasting. the first thing that came to mind was the internet, so guess what im fasting from... i wont be around for the next 7 days, at all.. and if you see me online, get angry at me and tell me to get off. unless im doing reseach for an assignment (which i shouldnt have to do)
i will keep journalling and update you all next monday afternoon.
i thought about food fasting, but then rethought. i dont eat enough already, and my thinkings about food need to be set right before i fast from it. so no net for a week.... w00t...
Haven't I ALWAYS told you, berated you over and over, you're beautiful! If God thinks you're beautiful, you must be beyond any description human language can offer.
