This barrier between You and me is painful. i feel distant, removed from You. and whats worse is that its my fault its here. to truely repent i have to turn from this... and to ask forgiveness. my feelings atm are not just hormone induced, or lack of food induced. i wish to run away and cry. it makes me act differently towards my friends. i am slower, sadder. twice today the i was almost overwhelmed by tears, but i held them back. what do i have to cry about? i wish to just melt into nothingness, to feel no pain, to feel no saddness. to truely give my body rest it so needs.