Silence

I open my eyes, and look to the hills.
i look to hear You, but you are silent.
i look to see You, but you are hidden.
i look to feel You, but you are distant.

i want to hear You, but i am impatient,
I want to know of my future, of my life.
but i am childish in my demands.
i just want to please You, Trust You.

still this fear within me Lord.
still this impatience.
Give me courage and Your strength.
I ask those things instead.




my thoughts are all stuck swimming within my head, and they are unable to come out. how difficult it is to express how i am right now.

Lord be with me...
let not your voice be silent.

handed out resume's today. little steps to become braver, to get over this fear.
have been praying more. been reading John, up to the 10th chapter. a confusing book.
finished Passion and Purity by Elisabeth Elliot. excellent read. encouraging.


im not sure if this fast has actually proved worth while. no, it had. perhaps i went into it with the wrong expectations. i was impatient in my demanding of God to want to know about my future. of what He wants of me. of what He wants me to do.
im still only hearing "trust me". i doubt whether its actually Him talking, or whether it is just my own thoughts.
i guess i just want to know more...

6:20 pm | Permalink